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7:15 a.m.
2003-10-15
Aspects of Me
I'm turning into things I don't want to be. I mean, I don't hate the person I am. I know I could improve myself, because everyone always thinks they can improve themselves, but I even have a list of things to do. I'm following it so far, but there are little things that are bugging me.
The anti-social thing is definitely one of them. I don't mind being around, say, the people in the lab, or the people in Todd's class, or the guys, or my girls, but if something like that mixes, or I enter Anne's class, or I go to the McGaw lab...I don't know. It's really strange, but I get really out-of-place and feel all awkward and just want to leave. Hell, I was out with the guys on Saturday night and still wanted to do that, so I guess it wasn't just a not that group of people thing. Lord only knows.
Then there's this need to be clingy to those I want to be around. I know Sue or Sarah or someone of that nature will come into my lab today, and in my head, I'll be screaming for them to stay when they leave, but I know I can't do that (so it's not just you, Lowell, so blah). For the next few weeks, I've got papers and quizzes galore, so I need to un-clingify myself from people. I mean, I'm sure it's nice, but I also know that it will get annoying after a while.
I don't know...I'm a strange one. You're talking to the girl who went to bed around ten, fell into a crushingly deep sleep, then woke up with a start at 3 AM for no reason whatsoever. Then, just my luck, I couldn't fall back asleep. Now, I'm sitting at my computer, dazed because of the weird sleeping patterns, and coughing my lungs out. Whee.
It's going to be a great day. And even if it doesn't seem that way, at least I'm going to try and make it so.
Quote for the Day: "Vitality shows in not only the ability to persist but the ability to start over." --Francis Scott Fitzgerald